Friday, July 3, 2009

Simple yet Complicated.....Relationships Vicious Circle !!

Remembering the past is most of the time relaxing...only some incidents that really makes u feel uncomfortable. I remember during school days life was so tension free of what u do or what u talk. One could simply say anything to any of your friends, fight with them...and then after school we all were together with our hands on each others shoulder, joking around as if nothing happened. Now if i compare it with today one has to be careful what comes out of my mouth that he may not like and his angers hangover would stay for long!!!I too have changed and react differently to different situations. One can get into heated arguments have we all changed??? . Life never remains the same. So funny...we are the same person, or is it that the content is same only the layout is different.

Its not only in friendship that this happens i suppose in every relationship. I guess its all because of the vicious cycle of relationship. Any relationship that enters into the introduction stage has great demand and enjoys the want from both sides of the relationship. Thens it enters growth stage as ones dependability on the other increases. The graph goes high in a love relationship, where the couple just want to stay with each other as much as possible...wonder they never get bored of each!!! Now relationship enters the maturity stage as nothing exciting is going around during this period. Its here all the tension or dissatisfactions creeps in. At this stage if all the problems are not answered and solved these can emerge as big problems in future and ruin the relationship. Actually majority of us at this stage are in a "controlled schizophrenic "..that ultimately results us going in the next stage.Things have changed but we dont seem to either accept it or not able to see it. It then leads to decline stage those problems that we had not answered and thought that as time passes by things will be fine and get healed...never ever happened. Ultimately the relationship experiences this stage , i.e end of the relation.

Now with end of a relation, one cant just stop in that time zone or go back to those cushion days. So now life gives us another opportunity to enter into another relationship with the introduction stages door always open for us.
This is reality...the sooner we accept it, better it is for us!!!


Its been nearly a month now, guys i forgot to mention one thing. My blog has been awared "Honest Scrap" award by Dr. Chandana Shekar , thaks a lot, sorry for posting it so late!!!

I would like to pass it to my fellow bloggers-

Deepika Gupta
Neha Thakkar Silam


Zeba Talkhani said...

Congrats about the award!!!

And wht u have mentioned here is what I am going thru right in college!! School days were really tension free

KB said...

Thank you so much Nazesh. I am honoured.

Neha said...

reading this post felt as if i was reading what i have always been thinking about...but somehow could not express it in words...kudos nazish for coming up with a splendid post...

and thanks a lot for the tag...:)

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Zeba

Thanks Zeba...i agree with u,school days were dam good, in fact i miss my college days too.


The honor is mine Karen!!!

@ Neha

Thanks a lot Neha....ya we all go through this vicious circle as far as our relationships are concerned!!!

sujata said...

Congrats!! Btw is that sujata me? there are lost of sujata s in the blogosphere

sujata said...

The idea is to keep any relation at the maturity stage and not let it go to the decline stage, easier said than done, but worth the hard its always better to have limited number of close relationships, so that we can work on it and not mess up! great thought1

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Sujata

lol...Yup Sujata its u. I have tagged u!!

ya to help the relationship to maturity stage and not go to decline stage needs participation from both the parties...but some dont trust others at this stage!!!

Deepika Gupta said...

Well... true relations hav no decline stage....
But out perspective towards things changes as we move towards maturity.... i remember in graduation once my professor said...
"Enjoy things and relations today with emotions, smiles and tears... when u'll grow up and struck up in the circle of life you'll lose these emotions and feelings...."
And sometimes i feel when i'll grow up that way... :|

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Deepika

That was some really great words from your professor...its so true.

Thanks for sharing this and commenting here!!!


JD said...

expectations are the cause for all complications. The more u expect, the more dejected u get when u do not receive what u wanted..

so, expect less and the relationship remains stable, simple and forever.

ARUNA said...

hey Nazish, congrats on your award and so thoughtful of you to pass it on to me too.....thanks dear, i'm touched!

Deeps said...

You're so right,Nazish that when we were young we were so carefree,we hardly thought if our words or actions would bother our friends so much but as we grow up we get all the more sceptical of our relationships.Its just that we are porobably more at guard.

Lastly Congratulations for your award.You deserve every bit of it.
And thank you from the bottom of my heart for passing it on to me. I'm truly honoured :)

GAURAV said...

nice to see ur blog..... ur all post are superb

Regina said...

Congratulations. How nice.
Still reading some post.

Nazish Rahman said...

@ JD
but its difficult not to expect anything being in a relationship!!!

Thanks a lot Aruna...u simply deserve it!!! take care

@ Deeps
Thanks ya, u too deserve it...your so correct that we are more at guard.

@ Gaurav
Thanks a lot !!!
do visit again!!!

@ Regina
So nice of u...thanks a lot!!!

Aparna said...

Splendid post.
Every phase has its unique flavour, though we have the luxury to be completely spontaneous and carefree when we are in our school or college days. With age one loses a bit of that learn to be more cautious.
As far as the relationships are concerned, you have to nurture them all the time. Then they do not decline.

Ersa said...

nicely put...

school days were really tension, nothing :-)...but then we can't always be that way...need to grow up and confront complex things complex relationships!

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Aparna

Thanks...yup every phase has its own flavor!!

@ Ersa

ya but things become so complex when one grows up!!!

Swatantra said...

Very well correlation!!

I believe everyphase has its own tastes.. some sweet and sour..

shilpa said...

I do agree that everybody has to pass a certain stage of compications in every walk of life.Whether its school or college its always a testing time of your life because your past make the kind of person you are in future.So just my opinion there is no formula to sucess in the relationship try your instint and do what work best for you and try to learn from your mistakes.

Babli said...

Thank you very much.I am honoured.Very nice and interesting post.I liked it very much.That was absolutely great words from your prof.Congratulations for your award.
Keep writing.

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Swatantra

Thanks...yup n we need to learn from all those experiences.

@ Shilpa

Well said Shilpa!!!

@ Babli

Thanks a lot !!!

Meira said...

Congrats :)
And thanks for visiting. Do drop in again :)
You've got a cool blog here.

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Meira

Thanks a lot!!!

Noor Mohammed said...

Assalamu alikum brother, I am very glad to read your blog. And I am happy that you are a guy with fear of God too. How about following some instructions given by the religion which you and me follow?? As far as my small knowledge concern we males are prohibited to wear female ornaments. Brother, I have seen a necklace around your neck. Don't misunderstand me, I just tried to make you aware if you are not already.

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Noor Mohammed

Angel said...

Thanks Nazish...

Liked this post. Well I would say that we all go thru such phase in relationships but its not a vicious circle that we enter the first phase...We need to take care of our relationships and its not necessary that all relations come to an end always...One should handle such things with care and any phase of a relationship can be brought back with love,compassion,trust,faith and many more...


Nazish Rahman said...

@ Easha

Ya but u see sometimes situations go out of our control no matter how hard you try!!!

Angel said...

Yeah I our school days we really dint had to worry abt such petty things..But now kisko kya bora lag jaye and kya ho jaye ussi mein we waste so much time..At times there are things we dont say intentionally become such a mess..But on the other hand I believe if something like tat happens the other person should be open to forgive and move on..rather than holding the would not take anyone anywhre..Life is short, one should enjoy and live it to the fullest..We never know what tomorrow brings in for us...

Take care

Suman said...


Sakshi said...

Congrats for the award and double thanks for passing it on to me....the award keeps me giggling mad...Honest!

Hey I don't know if I have will have to ask my near and dear ones that. But one thing is there I go the extra mile to keep people I love and care for always happy and in that I find my happiness...great post.

Nazish Rahman said...

@ Suman


@ Sakshi

This shows what a lovely person u r...u find very few in todays world!!